when i feel lonely i put on perfume

perfumes and loneliness and them together

When I feel lonely, I put on perfume.

Scent is my friend. She takes me places, or maybe even puts me back in my body where I belong. Or maybe, she turns me into someone else just for a moment of exploration.

To be lonely is not to be alone, but both have a potent kind of magic in them. The magic of loneliness is the braveness of sitting with feelings you wish passed a little quicker.

To face the present when you feel like a ill-shaped puzzle piece trying to fit the wrong puzzle.

The ever-present human desire to wish something was different. Easier. That the thing that doesn’t feel right becomes right, and ideally, with a quickness.

When I feel lonely, hugging my knees in my bed at 3AM, I try and reframe it: loneliness as a meditation. Loneliness as a metaphorical tea date with my innate rawness.

A rare moment of time where I can connect with source material for some kind of project, surely. I’ll channel it eventually.

I’m human and I’m here. Things aren’t perfect but in some ways that’s cosmic perfection itself.

I wonder what future me thinks.

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Here are some perfumes I am wearing lately, and if I have worn them when I felt lonely

I thought about doing perfumes that remind me of loneliness. But I thought it would feel more real if I shared the actual perfumes I’ve worn during and through and around loneliness

1. Jest by Andrea Maack

✅ Have worn when I felt lonely

👠 Plum, vanilla, rum, chocolate, cardamom, heliotrope, musk, apple

Jest has earned its place at the top of the list. Despite it being a dark berry, boozy, gourmand that feels like a cold-weather choice, I think Samantha Jones would wear it year-round. This fragrance took me to a place where I could see a new version of myself blossoming. Someone I hadn’t met yet, but someone I needed.